y mother recently admonished me to have more patience with life, my friends, and myself. Who better to teach me about patience than my mother? “The patience of Job” was said about her often. She raised five children, taught high school English, and she has survived the worst pain that a mother can endure–the loss of her child, not once but twice. Yes, my mother..we have had our disagreements, but her children do indeed “arise up and call her blessed.” Proverbs 31:28
Society today is nothing but one insta-click of distraction and entertainment. I was thrilled when I purchased my IPad because my dream of a 24/7 bookstore was finally fulfilled (no Walmart doesn’t carry my usual choices nor have the ambiance). Also, my new bookstore served wine, ahem, from my own kitchen. I can’t argue the convenience, but I wonder how improved my life is with the innumerable choices offered via a digital bookstore.
Of course, my example is books (big shock, I know) but the same could be said for music, food, and even inter-personal relationships. Everyone is in such a hurry today. There seems to be this revolving door of information with no one really taking anything anyone else says into account. There isn’t face to face contact anymore–email me, facebook me, text me. Really? No wonder our children are desensitized to so much. People aren’t even people anymore just a face on a profile that you can passively interact with daily.
Recently three very dear women to me, and I decided to start our own sort of anti-Facebook–where we actually get together once a week EVERY WEEK–imagine. We are going to spend this time encouraging each other and drinking a ton of coffee. All of us being young mothers–you can imagine that “patience” will be high on the list whether it is for their husbands or in my case, my black lab–hey–he always has his ass on the couch and never cleans up after himself (totally counts), our children, or even patience with ourselves.
I struggle with perfectionism. I always have. I was the baby so I was, of course by default the MOST “adorable, bright, and clever” girl (not to mention spoiled rotten…). As much as the doting helped my self esteem, it fostered in me an impatience to always be “on”..never be vulnerable..always be strong.
Grieving takes patience. Patience that I struggle to accept. Patience that requires a strength that I don’t always have; however, my three dear friends above not to mention my countless other friends and family are there for me and remind me that patience requires me to let go of the perfectionism and unrealistic expectations of myself.
I know that my new life will come..the life that I will lead changed by such loss…will be one of beauty and happiness if I can just have the patience to find it. And my hope is that one day, my sons will arise up and call me blessed like my mother before me. I LOVE YOU, MOM!
(Author’s Note: my mother would like you all to know–she is sitting in an atrocious chair at the hospital where the professor had just been born–NOT something that was purchased for one of our homes..ok, mother, noted and now everyone knows where I get my perfectionism)